in the aftermath

I haven't really talked too much about the breakup, but in the wise words of the Gilmore Girls...

LORELAI: Well, wait. Take me through the night step by step.

RORY: Why?

LORELAI: So I can help decipher what happened here.

RORY: What happened here is we broke up. He didn’t want to be my boyfriend anymore, end of story.

LORELAI: That is so not end of story.

RORY: Yes it is.

(Season 1, episode 17 "The Breakup, Part 2)

So this blog post is not about what happened in the breakup, but rather in the aftermath of it. 

You see, it was rather sudden, and rather unexpected (although I did somehow know for that whole week beforehand that it was going to happen). And so for a few days afterwards I just had to keep reminding myself that it had happened. And once I had come to terms with it, I built up my protective barriers and instilled boundaries -  did the obligatory hair cut, removed things from my life that would remind me of him, gave away things that I had bought for him, returned some gifts to him (but not all of them, he was a rather good gift giver), changed things around so that it's not the same as when I was with him. 

Now that it's been a while, I find myself thinking of what happened less and less, to the point where this last week I've actually been thankful for being single right now; the way in which our relationship was, I don't think I would have coped with this week. 

This last week has seen three new projects come onto my plate, on top of the two major ones that already existed - Supervisor P has so much (blind?) faith in my abilities and has volunteered my time to co-ordinate important projects, most of which involve me speaking to really important people about the issues. I've gotten to work at 8am most mornings and left late most days (except Friday, we all left early to head to the pub). This might be normal for some of you, but not me; this is my first proper adult job. 

When the breakup happened, I put myself out there and reached out to people - and I have been so blessed. At church, at work, with my Book Club girls, my housemates, my family - so many people have made me feel more loved than ever before, and people I didn't really know well before have become so dear to me now. I'm saying this because this whole week I have been surrounded by people who have continually built me up, reassured me, allowed me to vent, smiled and nodded when I got excited talking about infectious diseases and they had no idea what I was saying... that's true love right there people. 

I know that whilst I haven't really explained much in this post, it's been rather cathartic typing out these words - I've come to a point where I've accepted what's happened, I am so grateful for the relationship, and now am so thankful with where I am, being single, doing two Masters degrees and still living in Perth.