I quit

Three weeks ago, whilst at Honkytonks in Canberra, I downloaded Tinder to my Blackberry.

Yes, I have a Blackberry - no, I don't live under a rock, I just happen to prefer feeling what I'm typing out with my super awesome qwerty keypad. And now that I can install android apps, I have the best of both worlds - suckers!

Anyway, back to the story...

Yes, I downloaded tinder - after hearing some hilarious stories from my friends and witnessing some delightfully sucky romantic couples arise from the social-media-come-dating app I thought I'd give it a go.

It was fun at first - I actually went on four dates in the space of 24 hours during this crazy honeymoon period. But the fun quickly wore off as guy after guy would start chatting to me, only for it to end with me having to declare that I'm not the kind of girl who goes to a strangers house to have sex.

Basically, I just got tired of having to fight to find a decent guy who is looking for something more than that. 

So I deleted my account, removed the app, and I now no longer have tinder.

It was a great ego boosting exercise, and I had lots of fun, but in the end it's just not for me. I want to find the guy who will be my best friend; come travelling with me, listen to my awful jokes, be around and must love God. 

Goldilocks plays golf

I hate mini golf.

No seriously, I hate mini golf.

Why, you might ask? Well it's because it's too small - I once hit the ball too hard and smacked the guy three holes ahead... oops! But seriously, it's small and finicky and basically stupid.

I don't exactly like normal sized golf either. My powerful whacking technique only gets me halfway down the fairway, which leaves me feeling incompetent and stupid, and why should I pay money to feel that when I can just go to work and feel that?

That brings me to Supa-golf.

I love supa-golf. It has mini golf sticks, balls the size of those you'd find in a kiddies ball pit, and holes that are able to be finished in only a few whacks. Supa-golf is just right.

2012 attempt at supa-golf - into the sandtrap...  

2014 attempt at supa-golf - into the water...

one week in

As previously stated, I joined the craze and got me onto tinder, an online-dating-slash-social-media app where you look at someone's photos and decide whether or not you'd say yes or no. If you say yes and they say yes then bingo, start chatting!

And boy have I been chatting! I've even been on a date with a really nice guy here in Perth*! Yeah I know, I only got back into town on Friday night...

There have been some crazy guys - I mean do you really think I'm going to go over to your house tonight and have sex with a total stranger?

Also some full on profile pics - I mean do you seriously believe that I find your completely naked body (some even in a state of arousal...) attractive? There are several guys who think I will - and I quickly swipe left after giggling over it with whoever is closest by at the time (James coped a few of them today).

Overall it's been somewhat rather ego boosting that with every guy I have swiped right, they had already swiped right. And who doesn't like a little injection of feeling the love into their lives?

As Darryl Somers used to say "you'll never never know if you never ever go"...

I'm not going to get a boyfriend sitting around waiting for him to just rock up; I've gotta get out there and meet new people - and sure, I'm probably not going to find a Christian guy on tinder, but who knows? God works in mysterious ways...

*Don't worry Mum, Kara knew where I was...

all the things I can't say

Sometimes the events of life are outside of your control.

Getting fired at work, loosing loved ones, illness, car crashes, break ups... 

Sometimes it's in these times when the person you would turn to is the person who inflicted this pain. 

So you learn to live without them, to tell other people your exciting news, find people to go to the movies with, try new things and meet new people, and eventually you realise you've learnt to be strong on your own and you're happy once again. 

It doesn't mean that those feelings no longer exist, it's just that they're not at the forefront of your heart. 

Sometimes they come back, and all those feelings come rushing back and you have no idea where you stand. 

There's a fine line between love and hate, says my very wise Mother. 

I hate the way you make me feel

I hate that I let you

I hate the way you stand there and laugh

I hate that you are near

I hate it when I don't see you

I hate it when you don't say hi

I hate it when you talk to me

I hate it because I cry

I hate it that you still care

I hate it, it's not fair. 

cheers

It's Friday afternoon, which in most circumstances calls for trip to the pub, but this particular afternoon definitely calls for a beer as it marks the last lot of classes I have to do for my second Masters degree... the last two weeks have been intense with work reviews and thesis planning and presenting in front of the whole school of epidemiology here at ANU and sitting through hours upon hours of amazing lectures from some of the most prominent epidemiologists from around the world, most who have done this exact same Masters degree.

Betcha you're exhausted just reading that last paragraph!

But it hasn't been all work, I've had some play - dinners with my classmates, movies with Daniel at the outdoor cinema, flirting through Tinder, drinks with Anna-Lena and a roadtrip up to Sydney to see my favourite Dr and her fantastic family... 

So cheers Canberra for the break from Perth, for the rain and the cooler weather (although not your freaking humidity, you can go shove that), for the cheaper coffee, food and alcohol, for the people and the gorgeous lights from Mt Ainslie.

#thesiscountdown = 251 days 

reading the clues

Huge dog, tattoos, another girl in the picture...

Swipe left.

Yes, I've taken the plunge and entered the world of tinder... laugh away but this judgmental social app is really no different on how you rate people in person.

Look like a slob? Won't approach me? Go for a stupid football team? Swear like a sailor? Yeah, that's a swipe left (in real life, I would ignore you and walk away)

Taller, older and have an accent? BOOM, I'm swiping right! (in real life, I shall be flirting like crazy)

What I've learnt in the first 48 hours
Tinder is seriously addictive. And it's not just me who thinks this - my happily married friends love playing with it too.

But the downfalls is that you are glued to your phone - I'm waiting for the flashing red light. I'm turning into one of those gen-Y'ers who always have their phone out and I don't want to be one of those! I'm bad enough with whatsapp and facebook, and I feel like this could consume me.

It's more like a game rather than actual dating, much less serious than other forms of online dating and much easier to start conversations. It's a good way to learn how to make a good first impression, and I love to meet new people.

Whilst I'm in Canberra it's not as though anything will happen; it came about on a tipsy Friday night that the girls convinced me that I should sign up, and being under the influence I did... hahaha! It made for a fun Sunday sesh where we swiped away. But when I'm back in Perth I shall have to learn self-control and not allow myself to get obsessed with it.

For me it's harmless fun - I'm not looking for anything serious, but it's so nice to think that my pics are actually attractive enough for someone to swipe right - talk about ego boosting!

time to think

I think sometimes we get too caught up in the situation, whatever that may be, and need to step out of it in order to refresh our vision and renew our enthusiasm and just have a change of scenery.

That's why I try and take an overseas holiday (at least) once a year... although this year I'm hoping for more than one... but that is another blog post once things have been finalised!

But it doesn't have to be as grand as an overseas holiday - in fact domestic ones are lovely too. There's nothing better than going home and having coffee and doughnuts with Mum in Melbs when I'm back. Although I suck at getting work done when I'm back home.

Right now I'm in Canberra, which is about 3,700km away from Perth. I've been here for uni, so whilst I haven't actually gotten my head out of my work and all my projects I've got going on (I think there's six?), it's been the removal of distractions, such as the loud tea room or the office with no windows or the stinking heat, that has meant this week has been über productive. 

Here is my office. 

It smells of pine needles and the temperature is perfect - sunny but not burning my skin.

Here's to me getting a lot more of my thesis done so that when I get back I can spend a week with my parents who are coming to Perth for my graduation! woo!

258 days until thesis submission!

this is not a career plan

Hello from the much cooler climate of Canberra, which for those who didn't know, is the capital of Australia (that's right - some random city in the middle of nowhere, not Melbourne or Sydney). 

What am I doing in Canberra? Going to uni - no, I don't go to UWA, I actually attend ANU and every now and again they like to make sure we're alive and doing okay, so we fly over and attend classes and get to hang out with the other people doing my course all over Australia (there are 8 of us in second year). 

Today we discussed the topic of planning a career, in which our teacher proclaimed we were to have a 5-year plan...

Seriously? Who on earth knows where they'll be in FIVE years time?!

I'll be 33 in five years time, that's about all I know. 

I finish my Master of Philosophy in Applied Epidemiology on December 12 this year (283 days #thesiscountdown) - I'll then be going home to Melbourne to celebrate my Mum's big b'day and then going to sit on a beach for a week before going back to Melbourne for Christmas. 

And that's where my formal plans end. 

That's not even a 1 year plan...

I know I eventually want to work with refugees and displaced people groups, helping provide basic hygiene and sanitation and preventing spread of disease. But as how to get there I'm not too sure.

Whilst this sounds rather irresponsible - having spent the past 3.5 years at university in post-graduate studies working my butt off in order to obtain entry into my chosen career field you would think I would have more foresight. But it's not that easy. In this industry, it's not only what you know, but it's who you know and being in the right place at the right time; basically good "luck". 

Sure, it's down to "luck", but for me it's down to having faith that God has it under control - that he has a plan and it will all work out in the end. This doesn't mean that I sit back and wait for life to arrive on a silver platter - no way, that's not how life works! I will be putting myself out there, volunteering and learning french and trying to glean as much wisdom as I can from the amazing people who are in my life right now. 

But what I do know is that there's no point stressing about it.

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope" Jeremiah 29:11 [ESV]